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1-29-13 (10:19pm)

The last couple days have been hell. My step-daughter made me cry. Our car got repossessed and have to pay a shit ton to get it back. I'm smoking like a chimney...which doesn't help with the money situation at all. I'm torn up inside. I want to break down every couple of minutes. Borderline Personality Disorder SUCKS! Let's start with how my step-daughter made me cry. We were sitting in the dining room like always and I made a comment to our youngest about 'my' kitchen. Then my step-daughter said something about me always saying 'my' or 'mine' and I never 'ours'. It made her (in her words) feel like she wants us out of the house. Which btw, I'm having a hard time with my kids growing up. She's going off to college real soon and I have yet to make a fuss (cry and whatnot). Well the hubs saw me crying and told her to apologize to me and I said no worries. It wasn't so much what she said that made me cry it was a accumulation of a bunch of shit coming out. Then yesterday our car got repossessed :( Not very happy about this. I felt like I let down my family. Ok have to stop now or I'm going to cry again. More later....promise.  

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