4-23-14 (2:00 am)

I can't sleep. It could be that ate a shit ton of jelly beans but that's besides the point. I just have so much on my mind. My son has his first physiatrist appointment first thing I the morning. He's been battling depression for a couple years now however his father always used a more holistic approach. I myself believe that my should have been in therapy when my father passed away but alas we are here. So first thing in the morning we see Dr. Kahn. I've never met this doctor but I've done my research. Anyway my son is scared and so am I. I know that he is depressed but we just don't know how bad. He has had it rough for the last couple years. My father, whom he was very close to, passed away. Three years later his great-grandfather passed away. Then his father has embraced his step-son and left his son behind. So my son came home to me in January. It's been interesting to say the least. So many doctor appointments for so many things. CAT scan. MRI scan. Many therapy sessions and now a physiatrist. I hoping that this appointment will do the trick. Find out what if anything is wrong with my baby boy. I know he's almost grown (he's 17) but I worry like he's a baby.